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The Scallop: Can New Technology Save Cinema?

Satire—It’s no secret that movie theaters have been struggling in the past few years following the pandemic, but a new development in theatrical technology has made a massive breakthrough in audience immersion. Perhaps you have sat down to watch a film and thought to yourself, “Why don’t any of the characters ever use the bathroom? Surely they must have to use the bathroom.” You would be right, but the trouble has always been with theater equipment not being up to par to carry out the director’s unaltered vision. However, with the new Cinemark-patented “Advanced Lavatory Immersion” system, you can now immerse yourself in the world of a film like never before. In the bathrooms next to the theater, real-life bathroom stalls are surrounded by a Dolby Atmos-approved microphone setup that triggers every time an onscreen character has to use the bathroom. This allows the viewer to truly believe that the characters in the film are living, breathing people, just like them. With the rollout of this technology beginning in June, movie lovers everywhere are rejoicing at the opportunity to view their favorite films the way they were meant to be seen.

~ Duncan Rampen

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